Brandon Project: Text for Writer = dollyoko

Date entered: 1997/9/9 4:37:00

NARRATIVE: dollyoko is now known as riverboy

the river boy floats up as the little ghost waits for him on the bridge of dreams
~ it is autumn, always

he is everything and nothing

all beauty ~~ all filth ~~ all silence ~~ all danger
he will be her life and her death for one dark impossibly sweet moment
and she . . . she will be haunted by a past which is forever the future

[doll yoko says: all data is theft]

he comes to her at dawn, makes her forget she is a ghost
a hole where her heart once lay and no flesh on her bones
he comes to her at dusk, his damp river clothes falling to his feet

they kiss ~~ becoming kiss, becoming fuck
becoming, becoming, always becoming

she becomes the river

she is the boy

and he is ghost

she takes his eyes that she may see that which he sees
she takes his hands that she may hold that which he holds
she takes his lips that she may share in all his kisses
wanting nothing, she takes everything
she weeps tears of code

pearls tumble from her lips

a thousand snakes crawl from her cunt
reminding her she is orphan slut, ghost, forever doll
zero, never one, never two
always becoming that which is other

it is in a state of complete desolation that the little ghost realises she must kill again
in order to survive this surfeit of love
so many beautiful boys have died at her pale hands so many blue green grey eyes making her their final feast
their bodies wrapped in hers as she takes their last breaths and makes them her first
[doll yoko says: your machines are clumsy, your wars redundant]
dollyoko is now known as claude

Date entered: 1997/9/9 4:38:00
DIALOGUE [riverboy]: he is everything and nothing.

Date entered: 1997/9/9 4:38:30

NARRATIVE: dollyoko is now known as riverboy

she weeps rivers, fills oceans with her sadness
the sky is heavy with clouds of remorse for acts not yet committed
oil spills like blood while the generals grow fat
and the people grow as sad as ghosts, forgetting how to dance

but she is ghost
and he is river
always outlaws

[doll yoko says: to kill is to forget]
she melts him with a gaze that is fierce and tender
feels his throat under her teeth
watches the butterflies escape from his eyes
he is always boy, always river
and she, she will be always doll
always pond, a ghost becoming

Date entered: 1997/9/9 4:39:00
DIALOGUE [riverboy]: forgetting how to dance

Date entered: 1997/9/9 4:39:30
DIALOGUE [dollyoko]: to kill is to forget

Date entered: 1997/9/9 4:40:00

NARRATIVE: riverboy is now known as dollyoko.

So Snakeboy's fucking her with this mango, this big mango cut into eigthths, the juices running everywhere, and she's lost in the fuck. He had thrown some razors to her and ordered her to shave her pussy, and she had complied, knowing the terms of the contract. It was after all only fair he had said, given the crimes she had perpetrated at his expense over the past few weeks. And in this state of exile she found herself remembering other crimes, other acts of violence, and she wept. Wept holt salty cunt tears for an innocence that was lost far too early, far too brutally.
but was she ever innocent?
She remembers when she was nine or ten, fucking her mother, her desperate mad screaming mother, grinding her little girl soft pussy over her mother's beautiful face, sticking her babygirl clit into mama's mouth, covering her ears with her hands, trying to stifle the pain of insanity, not wanting to hear ever again how her mama was the world's greatest saint and how she was going to create paradise on earth. How she hated the word 'trance' after that day, how she despised the stupid useless doctor who gave her mother tranqs that only kept her quiet for as long as the doctor was in the house and how she started up her awful creepy chanting.

Date entered: 1997/9/9 4:43:00
DIALOGUE [riverboy]: but she is ghost
and he is river
DIALOGUE [gash]: but was she ever innocent?
DIALOGUE [gash]: she can't remember who now
DIALOGUE [riverboy]: he is always boy, always river
and she, she will be always doll
always pond, a ghost becoming

Date entered: 1997/9/9 9:47:54
DIALOGUE [riverboy]: she weeps tears of code

Date entered: 1997/9/9 9:48:18
DIALOGUE [dollyoko]: a thousand snakes crawl from her cunt

Date entered: 1997/9/9 9:48:46
DIALOGUE [claude]: their bodies wrapped in hers as she takes their last breaths and makes them her first

Date entered: 1997/9/9 9:49:10

NARRATIVE: she melts him with a gaze that is fierce and tender

feels his throat under her teeth

watches the butterflies escape from his eyes

Date entered: 1997/9/9 9:58:2

NARRATIVE: @join doll yoko

You enter deep doll space zero.

doll yoko swims up from crater mud pond of dead girls. She places her moss damp lips on yours and kisses you tenderly. Her pale hands perform gentle inquisitions upon your fleshform as she haunts your imagination, bruising your skin with her words.

Date entered: 1997/9/9 9:58:49
DIALOGUE [gash]: it's over baby and you know it

NARRATIVE: gash ripped split bleeding slit
ice in her veins
totally fucked up on bad E
screen dump

Date entered: 1997/9/9 9:59:44

NARRATIVE: He fucks her as if she were already dead, shoving into her sweet rotting mango flesh.

cunts smooth as mirrors reflect her terminal gaze
taking her silver blade she cuts a line
real fast real slick fresh young slit
mirror site tight

DIALOGUE [riverboy]: she's dying man, who's gonna kill me now? who's gonna fuck my pretty corpses? who's gonna suck my cooling dick?

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:0:59
DIALOGUE [dollyoko]: sex and sudden death is totally too boring
laws are made by men who fuck their daughters

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:1:21

NARRATIVE: a pack of hungry ghosts hovers over the bridge of winter dreams

whispering: all history is pornography
whispering: trust no-one
whispering: to kill is to forget
whispering: a doll is forever
whispering: all women are ghosts and should rightly be feared

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:1:42

NARRATIVE: doll yoko, ghost girl tender and dirty, claws her way out of ragged gash skin. She slithers through the slit, translucent grey tentacles teasing her momma's lips.

Eyes soft watering holes, ghost ponds, sad salty holes. Sour plum lips. Octopus in her cunt, giving doll formidable grasp on human nature.

doll is the infinite spaciousness of zero, haunted by deep doll hunger and the impossible.

eagles swooping over river, mountains surround

paper red lanterns line impossible narrow laneways

old man in bath-house peers through bamboo blind, touching himself to luminous
gaijin display

sailormoon softmoan pantyporn peepshow in every convenience store

cocks permanently soft with self disgust

mothers fuck sons while husbands go down on their daughters

incest to neon pain pachinko surround sound

pork fat pig piss demon stirs cauldron with shovel
doll baby born of charcoal demon in filthy ramen bar
on edge of floating world

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:2:55
DIALOGUE [riverboy]: she's a ghost but she doesn`t know it
DIALOGUE [claude]: damage courting danger

NARRATIVE: oll rides subway
seduces softskin school boys mangahard in prussian uniforms

she`s a 7-11 ghost girl,
a modern convenience

doll plays with wealthy wives who never suspect she`s a cunt
her exquisite stiff formed from the dreams of mad women

she`s a salary ghost
ghosting for a living

doll plays with crones` sagging sento bellies,
taking their wispy secret hair between her stay-sharp serrated teeth,
tugging insistently until the old women`s fingers stray, remembering the future,
dreaming the impossible

DIALOGUE [dollyoko]: yes
always dreaming the impossible

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:3:18

NARRATIVE: soft accidents, haunted fucks

holding breath

doll dives deep into snow pond

brown stem like forest mushroom held firmly in pale hand

blood sharp knife cuts oysters from luscious salty bed

sea demon doll hole sailor moon

slow surface

taste stempearls on moss

zero swallows one

one becomes three

demon eats ghost

ghost drinks moon

lips touch lips

skin codes skin

stemmoon in ghostgash again

deep doll space

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:3:52
DIALOGUE [riverboy]: a ghost never tires

DIALOGUE [dollyoko]: and a doll is forever
DIALOGUE [riverboy]:
haunt me

fuck me

again, and again

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:9:53

NARRATIVE: They arrive. Drive along a sandy track. Park next to a small house. Across the water a search light. They get out of the car. He does not like the sand. He wants to fuck her. In the car.

Somehow they are both naked. An argument. Over the rules of fucking.
He has the car, he wins. It is not her city.

She is silent and still. She thinks of everything and nothing. She is eight, sixteen, twenty.
She is thirty-five years old.

He fucks her, comes over her belly. Wipes her clean with his white underpants in a gesture of chivalry. Throws them out of the car, onto the sand.

<she realizes his mother must wash his clothes>

DIALOGUE [gash]: she realizes his mother must wash his clothes

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:10:22

NARRATIVE: They are driving along deserted country roads. It is two or three in the morning. His silence is ominous. She becomes convinced that he is going to kill her and dump her body in the wasteland. Her body knows a terror so strong she thinks he must be able to smell it.

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:11:52
DIALOGUE [dollyoko]: mute





wrists bound by red scarf

lips sealed

sewn together

i disappear as you stare right through me

take your secrets to my grave

a ghost whose tongue has been cut out can't return to haunt you

bury me deep

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:13:11
DIALOGUE [riverboy]: i wanna live forever
upload me into your shiny shiny PVC extropian future
no drug can be as good as your cyber fingers
i'm on the drug, i'm on the drug, i'm on the drug that killed river phoenix

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:15:14

NARRATIVE: feeling quite strange . . .

flat grey cast over everything
breathe in this milky greyness
impossible to resist as it's everywhere i look, everywhere i go
i look out from the tower at the ash yellow plains of madness
can see no end, no horizon

despite this lethargy, this absence of will
some part of me knows you are there
wherever it is that you are

this certainty gives me immeasurable solace
i feel as though you are inside of me
it is strange and beautiful

renders me mute

Date entered: 1997/9/9 10:17:7

NARRATIVE: The girl allows her brother small glimpses of the developing perfection of her body.

Her gauzy clothes evoke in the boy's mind a chrysalid's pearly amber shell protecting the secret of metamorphosis. How he longs to examine her more closely.

And her cunt. It emits an intoxicating fragrance, evoking images of intricately carved sandalwood trunks garlanded with violets and ivy, waiting on a deserted dock in a mediterranean port.

His dreams are filled with pirates and knives and very buried treasures.

The boy rubs his hand lightly over his clothes, desiring to offer his beloved sister similarly tantallizing gifts. He too is changing, his youthful body evidencing signs of the man he is to become.

His hands stray as he thinks of her.

The way she leans over him to kiss him goodnight, her shimmering gown falling open, revealing still small breasts, her nipples as tempting as the first summer figs.

His gaze drops to follow the curve of her belly, leading to a grove of promises.

He swells undeneath gentle strokes, not knowing whether or not his sister is watching him.

Neither of them had any idea of privacy.

Date entered: 1998/5/20 22:42:47
DIALOGUE [claude]: I drift. Principally I drift. One day we'll build cities for drifting.

Date entered: 1998/5/20 22:43:44
DIALOGUE [X]: We all left when we couldn't steal anything anymore.